


spring day

by minalous



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Park Jimin (BTS) is a Sweetheart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:49:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23464210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minalous/pseuds/minalous
Summary: Spring was frozen for years inside Jimin's heart and there is no light. But the morning will come again.. No darkness, no season is eternal.
Relationships: Park Jimin (BTS)/Reader
Kudos: 11





	spring day

Days forgotten, days forbidden, days frozen in the dreadful past. The secrets exist to be found. Jimin is used to saying that whenever a conversation leads to a certain topic, maybe a sensitive topic which includes one of your friend's secrets. Jimin is dark and lost in thoughts after the times he remembers a little something of his life, stories you do not know of or never been able to ask of.

You respect his past life, never asked about anything he wasn't comfortable with. But in times, you are worried about his health. Jimin stops getting out of the bedroom, he doesn't eat until it's necessary, his face becomes darker and his serious, dead expression scares you. It scares you that he will hurt himself by acting so recklessly.

"Jimin please get out of the room"

You plead, repeatedly knocking on the door of your bedroom but Jimin refuses to accept any kind of help you or his friends can provide. He only goes to work and then hurriedly hides inside the darkness of the bedroom. Jimin's behaviour changes this time of the year; it's near April.

"Leave me alone!"

His voice cold, lacking of emotion. A different person, a different Jimin, someone you cannot recognise.

"Jimin, this happens for the past three years and I don't even know why. Let me help you"

"I don't fuckin need your help"

Tears threaten to fall from the corner of your eyes, the only thing Jimin had to do was to open the door and let you in- in the room and in his heart.

"I'm sorry. I only wanted to help"

It's already the next day, nothing had changed except for Jimin sleeping next to you. His bigger frame hugging yours carefully, as if he is afraid you will leave if he doesn't hold you so close.

"Good morning"

The voice of the man behind you is hoarse and deep- nothing like the soft, angelic voice he has. It felt like Jimin had been silently screaming all the previous days he was hidden inside the bedroom. After a short call he has with his secretary, he tells you he can steal a few hours from work. Being the CEO of one of the biggest companies has its privileges.

Jimin asks you to wear warm clothes because the place you were going to would be quite colder than it was in Seoul. He seems determined to put an end to the secrecy that kept getting between the two of you.

At all times, Jimin is the one to be the calm power, the one to keep you sane when everything falls around you. Maybe today is the day you are going to be the one to keep him safe.

From the time you entered the car you could sense anger in the air around you. Jimin's grasp around the wheel is so tight, his knuckles almost white from the strength he's using to hold it. It's a long ride filled with nothing but silence, silence you would once enjoy but now it's uncomfortable. Not being able to bear it, you fall asleep.

Jimin gently wakes you up after a long time; you can tell because when you look around you, the sun is starting to dive back into emptiness. The place Jimin has brought you is majestic, out of this world. Fields full of green, snow covering in a wonderful way the paths of the flowers.

With your hand in his, you walk into a path that leads to the tree that stands alone in the centre of the fields around you. The closer you get, the tighter his grip on your hand gets. Jimin's eyes fall on a pair of shoes that is hanging on one of the branches, seeking a way to reach out for it.

With a broken branch Jimin manages to take a hold of the pair of shoes with a small smile plastering on his lips.

"Before you start asking questions, I want you to listen to a story I have to tell. Could you please let me do that? I want it off my chest before it destroys our relationship and I end up losing you"

Jimin's eyes are looking right through you, the same look on his eyes like the day you saw him in your way home after visiting your mother. He looks disappointed.. Disappointed in life.

You nod without saying a word and let Jimin take everything he has hidden out of his chest.

"Seven years ago, when I was in my last year in college, I had a group of friends. Friends who had my back in life; in college, in my family, in my personal matters. We would do everything together. What we shared was stronger than a bond of friendship, what we had was unique."

You can hear the sadness behind his voice

"We felt like real brothers and it was great. There was this one time when Jin, the oldest of our group, asked us to come here, in these fields. He said that it was very beautiful that it had the sea so close to the fields and we could both camp and have a walk by the seaside. Jin was one of those who admired the nature and wanted to show the others how beautiful the nature is. We had a trip here every couple of months, we would do it as an escape of our boring lives."

Jimin comes right behind you and locks his hands around your waist, his bigger frame towering yours in a soothing way.

"There was this time, a year before I met you. Jin decided we should come here late at night because it would be nice to see the night sky. We would come here by train but because of the snow he said it would be better if we drove here. All of us had prepared something for that night. Jin and Namjoon cooked something to eat, Jeongguk and Yoongi had brought drinks and Hoseok, Taehyung and I had brought blankets so we could sit down. It was like a ritual we would do to come together even if our lives wouldn't let us do it."

Jimin's chin is now on your shoulder, tears start streaming down on his face as he continues telling you his story.

"Jin used to be the one driving us home but he felt too sleepy after having too many drinks. Taehyung decided to drive us home, he was the sober one among us since he didn't like the taste of alcohol. Jin and I were too drunk so we fell asleep in the back seats. Taehyung was an excellent driver but a reckless driver hit us. He fell asleep on the wheel.. And that was the moment my life changed. Taehyung died instantly and Yoongi too. The rest of my friends died during their way to the hospital. Only Jin and I survived. But my friends' death wasn't the worst part."

You can feel Jimin's breath hiting the side of your face but it suddenly stops..

"When I saw all of them laying still, breathless, covered in blood.. I lost my mind. I felt empty, numb, lost. I held Hoseok in my hands, he was the only one who wasn't unconscious. Hoseok whsipered to me, his words still echo in my mind. He told me "I love you. I'm sorry I can't keep our promise". Even in death, the only thing he cared about was me. His friend. I held him in my arms. When I felt his body get heavier in my arms my whole world fell apart. I kept looking my hands that were covered in blood and I couldn't believe it."

Jimin wipes his tears off and takes a deep breath.

"Jin and I were almost every day together. Crying, screaming, getting angry with ourselves. But we kept getting distant. We met for coffee, sometimes we went for dinner. Five days a week got three days, then two, then one.. in the end it got none. Jin would not talk to me about anything. He felt so different, so lost. I tried to give him all the time he needed to distract himself from all the loss, to let him know I'm still there for him. Jin called me one afternoon to tell me he was going on a trip to his favourite place. The very next day I got a letter. It was Jin. He wrote me that he needed to end his suffering, to meet the rest of our friends.. And the same day I came here."

Jimin walks towards the old tree, a sigh coming to escape his lips as he carefully puts the shoes back, pointing at them now that they are hanging on the branch. You turn your face to the side to look at him and he is there, with a sad smile on his lips.

"Jin's shoes. He left them there as a reminder of his life and death. He carved all of our names on the tree. A reminder that we were once here, together, happy and safe."

Jimin comes by your side and holds your hand tightly, your fingers laced together.

"One day we will meet again and we will be together. And you will be with us too."

You know that Jimin kept that secret on his own for such a long time. He takes the flowers that he has inside the car and carefully places them under the tree.

"A spring day, I will be waiting for the spring day that I will see you again."

••••

2 years later

Jimin and you are walking towards the tree with a smile plastered on your face, fingers intertwined. You both place flowers under it and softly touch the tree before talking. Jimin talks to the tree as if his friends are watching the both of you behind it.

"We came here to introduce you to your nephew" Jimin says as his hand softly caresses your tummy "His name is Hoseok.. but he will grow up knowing about all of you. My wife loves you as much as I love all of you now. Please take care of us from above."

Hoseok's promise was to be his firstborn's godfather. It was a promise he meant to keep.. Jimin knew that. It kills him that Hoseok would never be able to see little Hoseok grow up.

••••

27 years later

He walks towards the tree, hands on his pockets and his eyes glued on the shoes hanging from the old branch. He kneels down, his hand reaching inside his jacket's pocket and takes out a small necklace that has the initials of all of the boys that once were friends and inseparable.

"I came here today to tell you that I am happy.. I really am. I have missed you."

He takes another necklace from his pocket and places it next to the other one.

"Mom.. I miss you so much. I know you are happy with dad but I miss you. I'll come here again with my son next time. Dad.. I miss you too and I will make you proud. Dear uncles.. Hoseok, Jin, Yoongi, Taehyung, Namjoon, Jungkook. I am being a good nephew and I'll make you proud too. You are my best friends.."

All of his family is there; he cannot see them but they are there. Smiling proudly at their beloved son and nephew.

"Until the spring comes again, stay with me a little longer until I can come back to see all of you. Stay here. I will come see you.."


End file.
